Turns upon the Kaleidoscope
by OnTheImportanceOfLungs
Summary: Omakes, Oneshots, Lemons, and a whole bunch of goodies, written by me or other authors in the world of The Wizard of the Kaleidoscope. Stories about characters you've come to love. And characters that you want to kill. And some funnies.
1. Omake: Lunatime

Written by DLP's Zombie, the most opinionated of my Betas.

Can be used in any chapter in which Harry says...

"Kamui."

He appeared in Luna's bedroom, which was heavily warded by her father. Looking around, he saw the flaxen haired girl sleeping in her bed. A breeze came through the window, ruffling his frilly shirt, as Luna begins to awaken.

"Harry?" She questions. "What are you doing here? Did the Snorkacks bring your through the wards?"

Harry smirks, and says "There is nothing in this world that can keep me from my conquest." and with a gutteral growl, he launches himself at Luna, screaming, "LET US FUCK."

And they fucked. For twelve days and twelve nights. It was totally magical.


	2. Omake: Necromancin'

Written by Mana. Spoilers to The Eyes of Divinity, Chapter 44

"Tsukuyomi!"

"My skill is within Necromancy", the Harry, who looked even shadier than he did, finally replied.

"Necromancy." Harry gave a disgusted eye roll.

"What's your problem with my Art?" Necro-Harry clutched his chest and spun on his heel, "It's the only true path to knowing thyself! After all, if you have access to all to ever live or die, you'll certainly find her eventually! It is Art in its purest form! At the final moment of release, Art is imprinted-"

"What do you mean?" Harry asked, with a sinking feeling at the pit of his stomach. Surely he couldn't mean-

"You can't spell 'Necromancer' without the word 'Romancer'!"

There was a long silence. When Harry spoke again, his voice was soft and deadly, with just a hint of madness.

"The Red Moon is, first and foremost, a spell used to torture people..."


	3. Possibility: The Dark Lady

**Omake by Foonator**

People keep reviewing "Wouldn't it be awesome if Alyssa Potter was a Dark Lord?" Well, here's your wish.

**Alyssa Potter: the Dark Transgender Noble**

Disclaimer: Alyssa is not actually a transgender in this.

Albus Dumbledore and the figure clothed in swirling black robes (despite the lack of wind) were opposite each other in the battlefield that was Hogwarts. Death and destruction was the order for today. The aged wizard lay broken and bloody on the ground as his wand soared through the air, landing in his opponent's hand.

"Why?" Dumbledore croaked, his breathing labored and his eyes full of shades of sorrow.

"Why would I spell my robes to swirl about my personage? Because such eccentricity is expected of people like me, of course. It gives me a certain measure of legitimacy. Besides, I like it. It really adds to the whole 'doom and gloom' theme I'm going for." The figure stopped to admire its clothing for a brief second.

The bottle green eyes glowed with a shade reminiscent of the Killing Curse - insane and powerful beyond belief - as they bored holes into Dumbledore's soul.

"I made sure to thank Snape before I transfigured him into toad and fed him to my snake. Slowly. I named my snake Ovid, did you know that? After _his_." A giggle accompanied the statement.

"But if you're asking why I would attack Hogwarts, the answer is simple. I needed to fight you. Beat you. Destroy you! You see, I've taken a passing fancy to your former wand. The moniker 'Master of Death' is far more pleasant than 'Voldemort', I think. Ever since I've received the Stone, I've realized that my Cloak was something more. I had to... catch 'em all."

The figure pulled back its hood. The smiling face of Alyssa Potter, beautiful in a timeless sort of way, loomed over Dumbledore.

"It's kind of funny, really. I'm supposed to be the... _Girl_-Who-Won, The Chosen One, the Servant of the Light, the- I'm sure you know all my titles, Albus. I can call you that, right? We're old friends, after all." She smirked. "Seriously though, I have even more hyphenations than Tom ever had. I'll chalk it to superiority in every aspect."

A secretive little grin began to make its way across her face.

"And that's why they never see _anything_ I do coming."

The aged wizard writhed under her Cruciatus, thoroughly surprised at the sheer cruelty of the curse.

"I'm going to kill you, Albus. I'm going to rip my way through your mind. Like _he_ would have. Then, I'm going to kill everyone who still resists. I'm a tad unsure on whether I want to take over Britain or not. Burning it down seems _so_ much easier. It'll probably take a century or to before something trite and satisfying like world domination is possible. We both know that _you_ are the only thing protecting the world from all the things that go bump in the night. I wonder what _he_ would do? That other me is such an enigma, you see."

"Wh-who?"

"Why, Harry Potter, of course. The King of _everything_. I'm surprised you haven't noticed the little shifts in the fabric of reality. Those happen when he visits me."

"The breaking Dimensional Veil", Dumbledore exclaimed, horrified. "Wh-what have you done? Inviting something like _that_."

"I didn't even do it. Do you know the sheer extent of his power, Albus? Do you know how much power _his_ Albus is supposed to have?"

She pondered that for a brief moment.

"I'll write out a list of things he's capable of later. But times a-wasting, and these fools wont kill themselves... unless I make them. I do love the Imperius Curse so very much. Something I'll consider later. Anyway, I bid you a good death and a happy afterlife. As for myself, I'll never die."

As she was raising the Elder Wand to proceed with the mind raping, she paused. "Oops. Almost forgot."

She reached into her robes and pulled out a... present?

She tossed him the package and urged him to open it. Seeing his life at an end anyway, he oppened it.

"...Socks?"

"Yep," she said with a shit eating grin. "Figured I'd thank you for inadvertently gather the Hallows. You'd better appreciate it too, it was such a pain writing out your full name. I hope they can make a gravestone big enough to put it AND all your titles on."

"Goodbye, Albus Percival Wul- ah fuck it. What does Harry say instead of Legilimens? Tsukuyomi!"


	4. Omake: Moe

**Omake:**

Author's Note: This is everything I _didn't_ want Kaleidoscope to be. Take it with a grain of salt, and possibly alcohol.

Mana says: Lots and Lots of alcohol.

**Mangekyo**

Harry knelt. "Kingmaker-dono."

She was wearing a little dress with floral imprints, but when she moved, Harry's mind generated images of battle and glory.

Her white hair cascaded beyond her shoulders as she shook her neck as if to relieve a crick.

"Harry-chan."

"W-what do you want, Scathach-sama?" His air of nonchalance was betrayed by the air of timidity and the stutter that punctuated his voice.

"What do you think I want, Harry-chan?"

Harry thought of Avalon, and a little shudder of pleasure passed him. "Nuuu... what are you doing, Scathach-sama?" he moaned as a little tongue darted behind his ear.

"Should I stop?"

A furious blush splashed across Harry's cheeks and he pressed the tips of his fingers together. "Don't", he whispered quietly.

"What was that?" Scathach asked, despite the fact that she had heard him perfectly clearly.

The blush grew more pronounced. "D-don't stop, Scathach-sama!"

She carelessly pushed him to the ground and flattened him against the carpet. She then began to crawl slowly up his legs and thigh, hitting little points of pleasure that elicited quiet moans from Harry.

Her face suddenly dove at his most private of places and Harry gave a long, drawn out, "Unngh", as she nuzzled him slightly. "You're so cute, Harry-chan."

"Scathach-sama, don't be so-so b-bold. W-what if someone walks in?"

She stood suddenly, offering him a tantalizing view of her as Harry stared upwards.

"Scathach-sama", Harry moaned, disappointed. "Please", he begged.

"You dirty, dirty boy", she muttered. Harry's lip quivered and a tear formed at the corner of his right eye.

"I-I'm n-not-"

"Why, of course you are, you wanton child. Are you going to beg me some more?"

"Scathach-chamaaa, don't tease me so!" Harry all but burst into tears.

She had the look of an okami who had successfully ensnared her prey.

"I want to see you on your hands and knees in front of me, Harry-chan, my proud chibi-King", she mocked.

Harry sniffed and reluctantly bent his knees slightly.

A stern look was enough to convince him entirely.

"It looks as if you've done something right, Harry-chan. As a reward, you may kiss my feet."

Harry glared at her, but when he was met with her unwavering gaze, his own dropped to the floor.

An errant sob left his lips as he puckered and placed his mouth on her bare foot.

The foot lashed out, catching him on the side of the face, and sent him careening.

"Uguu...", Harry muttered in pain and surprise.

Scathach pinned him to the ground.

Harry felt a spike of forbidden arousal run through him. "Scathach-sama..."

She kissed him hungrily, her lithe tongue exploring his mouth until he was a squealing wreck, completely overwhelmed by the pleasurable sensations that he couldn't help but feel.

"...Uguu... Scathach-sama, you're so bad..."

"But you want it so badly, Harry-otouto..."

His blush returned at full force.

In the blink of an eye, his shirt and jeans were discarded off to the side, leaving him dressed in only his boxers.

A tongue teased his left nipple and he could barely keep both eyes open. His mouth was in a perfect 'O', inviting a finger which Scathach offered eagerly.

Harry hummed in delight as he tasted the tangy musk of the Fae. He couldn't hide his desire anymore. His hands fumbled at her dress, but she had disappeared.

"My, my. So very eager, aren't we, Harry-chan."

All his reservations came back in a tide of shame and his hands dropped to his side.

But Scathach had removed her dress, and she stood in her full glory in front of him.

"Onee-sa-"

The door banged open.

"Freeze! NYPD! Put your hands up!" barked a burly man flanked by three other officers carrying guns.

"You know what, Scathach? You may own me, but... find someone else to fucking roleplay with you next time. Kamui."

Harry and Scathach disappeared.

A police officer picked up a discarded volume of manga on the ground. "A Little Boy and her Big Sister? What the fuck is this shiiii-"

A burst of fairy dust jumped out of the pages of the book, and the two-hundred-pound man almost looked meek for a second.

"I wonder if this will please Onee-sama, Officer-tan", he muttered in a quiet voice, pouting. One of his buddies grabbed him by the shoulder.

"Bad touch, Officer-tan! Bad touch!"

**Mangekyo**

No, there is no lemon-loli action. You should be ashamed for even asking for it.


End file.
